Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I can count

Scientists Uncover Giant Spiders That Once Terrorized Jurassic Earth - The Daily Galaxy

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I can read

Win a signed pink cycling jersey of Giro winner Simon Yates - Team Visma

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

What firsthand information do you have on prisoner-on-prisoner sexual abuse/rape?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

S.A.-area rabies cases spark concern for officials. Here's why - MySA

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

'Mountainhead' Is Most-Watched HBO Original Film Since 'Bad Education' - Deadline

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Why does Africa have all mineral resources but she is suffering economically?

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

How do I stop having work crushes because I only keep getting disappointed almost every day as I keep seeing they don’t like me back and won’t ever ask me out?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

How can you tell if someone or someone's is trying to recruit or at least test you for a secret organization?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t cotton to rapists

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Tim McGraw's daughter Gracie McGraw comes out as queer: 'Happy freaking Pride' - USA Today

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Devin Harjes, "Boardwalk Empire" and "Manifest" actor, dies at 41 - CBS News

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Why won't biden give a last minute deferred action TO ALL undocumented immigrants so Trump can't deport them? Obama issued DACA, why can't Biden issue something similar that protects ALL undocumented immigrants from deportation?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I see through liars

HIV Drugs Linked to Lower Alzheimer’s Risk - Neuroscience News

I have a reading level above third grade

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

When gallery photos are deleted at the same time, why are Google photos also deleted?

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I actually pay taxes

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t buy bullshit